It’s Hot

—What’s your name?

–“My name’s Roosevelt E. Roosevelt.”

—Roosevelt, what town are you stationed in?.

–“I’m stationed in Poontang.”

—Well, thank you, Roosevelt. What’s the weather like out there?

–“It’s hot. Damn hot! Real hot! Hottest things is my shorts. I could cook things in it. A little crotch pot cooking.”

—Well, can you tell me what it feels like?

–“Fool, it’s hot! I told you again! Were you born on the sun? It’s damn hot! I saw – It’s so damn hot, I saw little guys, their orange robes burst into flames. It’s that hot! Do you know what I’m talking about.”

—What do you think it’s going to be like tonight?

–“It’s gonna be hot and wet! That’s nice if you’re with a lady, but it ain’t no good if you’re in the jungle.”

—Thank you, Roosevelt.